Jacky's Corner

  Have you ever felt swept up by a friend’s warmth, only to be left in the cold without warning? If so, you’re not alone. Many of us have experienced the perplexing dynamic of a “hot-and-cold” friend someone who seems intensely invested one moment and emotionally distant the next. This phenomenon is called emotional whiplash, and understanding it is key to protecting your own well-being. The erratic behavior of hot-and-cold friends often stems from anxious-avoidant attachment styles or emotional immaturity. According to psychologist Dr. Sue Johnson, founder of Emotionally Focused Therapy, these individuals desperately crave connection but are overwhelmed by vulnerability. They rush into intimacy, then retreat just as quickly not out of malice, but as a form of self-protection. Imagine a toddler’s hug: clingy one moment, pushing away the next. These friends aren’t “bad” they’re simply inconsistent. As Brené Brown notes in Daring Greatly , “The opposite of belonging is fitting ...

This weekend i was pondering the question of whether leaders are born or made . Looking beyond the surface, it’s clear that both viewpoints hold merit, and the true answer lies somewhere in the middle a blend of nature and nurture. Leaders Are born . Some individuals naturally gravitate towards leadership roles, often due to their upbringing in environments saturated with leadership examples. Firstborns, children of political or religious figures, or those raised in prominent families often absorb leadership qualities early. Witnessing decision-making and authority firsthand, they’re primed for leadership. Take Winston Churchill, born into political legacy, or Queen Elizabeth II, groomed for leadership from birth. Even rebellion against such backgrounds doesn’t negate the lasting impact of early exposure. However, being born into leadership doesn’t guarantee success. Some reject the path, while others excel, having learned what works and what doesn’t from their surroundings. Lead...

  There are weekends that pass in a blur of errands, obligations, and the quiet pressure to be “productive.” And then there are weekends that arrive like a soft exhale. This past weekend was the latter. Nothing extraordinary happened, and that is precisely what made it extraordinary. The days unfolded gently, without urgency or expectation. Time felt unhurried, almost generous. I moved from one small moment to another sunlight through the window, a slow cup of tea, the simple freedom of choosing what to do next, or not to do anything at all. It made me think about how rarely we allow ourselves to rest without justification. Rest is often treated as something to be earned, scheduled, or optimized. Yet, as the saying goes, “Almost everything will work again if you unplug it for a few minutes… including you.” This weekend felt like that quiet reset no noise, no pressure, just space. What stood out most was the absence of anxiety. There was no background hum of “what’s next?” or “what ...

  Over the weekend, I caught a program on TV while doing my chores. The gentleman speaking was passionate about one thing: stop asking religious leaders for medical advice. Go to doctors instead. He was specifically talking about ulcers. Every time someone feels stomach discomfort, they assume it's ulcers. And instead of visiting a clinic, they run to a pastor, a priest, an imam, or a reverend for prayer. Now, don't get me wrong. Faith is powerful. But faith without action is not complete. There's a saying I believe it's in the book of James: "Faith without works is dead." And Yogi Sadguru puts it beautifully in Inner Engineering : just because you claim to be a good person doesn't mean good things will magically happen to you. You must do the right things. You can sit in your house all day declaring you're a good person, but the crops outside won't grow unless you go out, dig, cultivate, irrigate, and harvest. Same with health. You c...

This season of fasting has felt different for me. Not louder, not more dramatic, but deeper. It has become less about what I am giving up, and more about what I am learning to let go of. We all have those small habits. The ones that sneak in quietly and settle like permanent tenants. The extra scroll when you should be resting. The delayed task you keep postponing. The small indulgences that slowly become patterns. You notice them, you question them, but somehow… they stay. This time, I decided to meet them differently. Fasting gave me a kind of shared discipline. A collective rhythm. You look around and realize you are not the only one trying to hold back, to be intentional, to sacrifice something. And in that awareness, it becomes a little easier to say no. A little easier to pause. I found myself thinking, if I can do this for forty days, then maybe I am not as powerless as I thought. There’s a small scene that stayed with me. One evening in Kampala traffic, the kind where boda b...

There was a story in a homily at work recently, and I haven't stopped smiling and squirming since. A man was ready to propose to a lady he had been courting for a while. But before he placed that ring, he wanted to be absolutely sure. So he hired a private investigator to dig into her background. Her character. Her past. Her fitness as a future partner. He kept his hands clean, used a third party, the whole operation was discreet. The report came back glowing. She was wonderful. No concerns. A gem. However, the investigator added, in the past six months, she has been spending time with a truly terrible individual. Rude. Reckless. Involved in all sorts of unsavoury activities. Honestly, she deserves much better than him . They attached the photos. The terrible individual was our man himself. I laughed out loud when I heard it. Then I sat there, caught. How often am I that man? Standing at the window, scrutinizing everyone else's garden, demanding blossoms and shade and swe...